Life of a Rogue knight

Mine is a life for others to play with, i am but a shadow of my former self, beaten broken over the years, lie low and stay low. Even flying below the rader means you still get caught later rather then sooner.

So i got caught, so what? well its not nice being caught. Got to face the consequences. well i am going to accept the punishment. next time i got to fly even lower. When you know how the system works its just a matter of time before they change the system.

No i dont know where i'm going,
but i sure know where i've been.
Hanging on the promises and the songs of yesterday.
And i've made up my mind
i aint wasting no more time.

Though i keep searching for an answer
i never seem to find what i am looking for
oh lord i pray you give me strength to carry on (LOnger)
cos i know what it means, to walk along the lonely street of dreams.

I am just another heart in need of rescue,
waitingon love sweet charity
and i am gonna hold on for the rest of my days

Olivia

She is my dream, the woman i fell in love with, at my age well i am 32 and she is 25, well not a bif difference in age, at least i am older then Jade goodies romeo.

We talked for over a year, and the bond that developed between us, just grew. we would sit for hours and talk, over coffee, over lunch, we speak for hours on the phone and dont want to put it down. Needless to say years later i realised how much i loved her.

People change. She changed, love is difficult, especially when she dreams of friendship but knows i wont give her anything other then my love, she wont walk away, and wont give me her love, though i see it in her eyes and her smile, her face and her manners. Oh yes she loves me, but decieves her self that it is friendship. Well i think it was there between us, but when you know you love someone, that should have been your friend, it makes it difficult because the dating part is .... well how can you date someone you have known for so long.

At a loss.

Business well is in the doll drums, that credit crunch has really messed things up. So what i can i say other then ride the storm. ride the lightening. Financial advice is no longer what it used to be. Well i say it takes 2 to tango. if lenders allow false statements on mortgage apps, and borrowers are happy to lie, then the rest of us ve got to be patient until the dance is over, why should they care if we suffer, cos consumer greed and corporate greed were made for each other. a marriage made in heaven.

The credit did crunch its way into my life. And so i am here to explain the way forward.

I am a rogue and a knight, my life is full of fear, fear of love, fear of the law, fear of being found out. So what may i do to unite myself and live not in fear any more?
Come clean? absolutely not.

I met her many years ago, and i fell in love with her. Her name is Olivia. Well we know thats not her real name. I am a business man and i can tell you she really did mess up my head. Met her at the wrong time, why cant i meet someone at the right time?

Business, well i got a guy who cant prove his income but needs cash from a bank. Did i tell him to go away no, i got him the money and got paid for it.